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2022-09-28 11:57:09 +0000 UTC View Post

Hi everyone, I hope you're all well. I wanted to have a qui..

Hi everyone, I hope you're all well. I wanted to have a quick chat/update about where I've been and what's been going on (for like 2 years really). I've been debating on whether or not I wanted to talk about it a million times and I always tell myself no. Mostly because I think it's embarrassing, but it also comes along with a lot of guilt and shame. It's just not something sexy for your onlyfans feed you know, and I didn't want to come across as whiney or negative in any way. But, I've been stuck in this viscous cycle for too long and I feel like the only way for me to move forward and heal is to be honest. Depression and anxiety is something I've struggled in the past and I thought that I had it under control. When I got pregnant I had all these expectations for myself and plans for content I wanted to make. It went well until the last few months of pregnancy. From there my mental and physical health went down hill pretty quickly. It's been almost 2 years and looking back and would definitely say I struggled with postpartum depression. Going through pregnancy and birth is hard enough. Then, I had my surgery just 5 months after i gave birth and needless to say, it was a lot. There were so many changes going on all at once that I was trying to adapt to and everything felt out of my control. Days just felt really hard and hopeless. I realize now that I put a lot of pressure on myself to be the girl I was before I got pregnant. This is the Brooke that would say yes to every custom video, picture, video call, and I would literally stay up all night sometimes talking to people and I love it. But trying to do all of this while being a new mom and struggling mentally was not great for me. To be honest, I felt like I was drowning trying to please others wants and needs that I completely neglected my own. The saying "you can't pour from an empty cup" is exactly how I felt. It just left me feeling empty. The people pleaser in me has finally accepted that I just can't do it all at this point in my life. With that being said I need to make a small change. I will not longer be accepting custom content. I use to love doing them but right now I need to spend my time and energy on taking care of myself, making content I want to make, and that everyone can enjoy. I look back and I love the content I've made and the interactions that I've had with so many of you and that's what I want to keep doing. I still have bad days, but I'm hoping that being honest and letting you all know what's been going on with me rather than hiding from it will help me have less bad days. Lastly, I just want to add how grateful and thankful I am to everyone who's subscribed and all my long time supporters. I see your messages and knowing that there are people who care means a lot to me, so thank you. Sorry if this was too much but i needed to get it off my chest. 🤍Brooke

2022-09-24 14:30:51 +0000 UTC View Post